Tired, Not Inadequate: Why Rest is the Secret to Success for Women in Midlife
You know that voice in your head? The one that whispers, “You’re not doing enough,” or “You should be further along by now,” or even, “Everyone else seems to have it all together.” Yeah, that one. It usually creeps in when you’re running on fumes, not when you’ve genuinely fallen short. Most of the time, it’s not about inadequacy at all—it’s about being tired.
We’ve just come off summer—a season of high energy, long days, and constant activity. Summer gives us permission to relax, but in a way that still feels full. Full of gatherings, full of late nights, full of “doing” and being everywhere all at once. And while we all love summer for its carefree vibe, let’s be real—there comes a point when even those endless summer days start to feel exhausting. You know that moment when you secretly hope for a rainy day, just so you can finally stay inside without feeling guilty? That’s your body telling you it’s time to wind down, to rest.
But Here's the Tricky Part
As we move into fall, the external world doesn’t slow down. Society doesn’t honor rest the same way it honors hustle. In fact, we’ve been conditioned to believe that rest is unproductive, that slowing down means we’re falling behind. And that’s when those whispers of “not enough” start creeping in.
For women in midlife, the pressure to “keep up” is especially intense. We’re juggling careers, family, and all the unspoken emotional labor that comes with it—making sure everyone else is taken care of while barely tending to our own needs. Add in the changes our bodies are going through—hello, perimenopause—and it’s a recipe for burnout.
how have you been feeling lately?
Think about how you’ve been feeling lately. A little bit of that summer hangover, right? Exhausted from late nights, high-energy socializing, maybe too many commitments. If you’re struggling to find your groove again, feeling like you’re falling behind, it’s not a sign you’re inadequate. It’s just a sign that you need rest.
But instead of listening to our bodies, what do we do? We push harder. We overwork, overthink, overdo. Sound familiar? Maybe it shows up in negative self-talk, where you berate yourself for not getting more done. Or maybe you find yourself micromanaging, picking apart tasks that weren’t done “just right.” All of this stems from a deep-rooted fear that we’re not doing enough.
This push, this hustle, this constant need to prove ourselves—it’s exhausting. And what’s worse, it’s unsustainable. We’ve fallen into the habit of believing that if we just work a little harder, if we just push through, we’ll finally feel like we’ve arrived. But the truth is, the more we push, the more disconnected we become from ourselves. We lose sight of the fact that rest isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a necessary part of the rhythm of life.
Here's the Reality
Rest is not a luxury. It’s not something you earn after you’ve worked yourself into the ground. It’s essential. It’s in the stillness where we find clarity and creativity. When we don’t allow ourselves to rest, we’re not just compromising our productivity—we’re putting our health at risk.
For women in midlife, the stakes are even higher. According to the American Heart Association, women who consistently get fewer than six hours of sleep are twice as likely to suffer from heart disease or stroke. Hormonal changes during perimenopause and menopause only heighten this risk. Inadequate rest has also been linked to higher rates of hypertension and hormonal imbalances, which can compound the challenges women face as they transition through midlife.
Here's the Good News
Prioritizing rest doesn’t just safeguard your health—it actually makes you more productive. Research shows that productivity can increase by 30% when rest is prioritized, not to mention the massive improvements in decision-making and creativity. Some of the best ideas in history didn’t come from frantic working—they came during moments of rest and reflection.
Take Albert Einstein, for example. His theory of relativity wasn’t born out of hours of grinding at a desk. It came to him during moments of daydreaming and relaxed thought. When we rest, we create space for our minds to process, to solve problems, and to generate creative ideas that simply can’t emerge when we’re constantly on the go.
So, as we transition into fall—the season of winding down and gathering in—it’s the perfect time to ask yourself: What if rest was part of your productivity plan? What if instead of pushing through, you gave yourself permission to pause, reflect, and recalibrate?
We’re entering a season that naturally invites us to slow down, to reflect, and to recharge. But because our culture doesn’t celebrate stillness, we often feel guilty for taking that time. Instead of embracing rest, we fall into habits of overworking, micromanaging, or filling every moment with busyness, all to avoid the guilt of not doing enough.
But what if rest was actually the most productive thing you could do right now? What if, by giving yourself permission to rest, you were actually setting yourself up for more success in the long run?
This fall, I challenge you to give yourself permission to rest. Embrace the slower pace, knowing that it’s just as important as the action-packed days of summer. You’ve done the work—now it’s time to recharge and prepare for what’s next.
And here’s the thing: Resting doesn’t mean you’re stopping. It doesn’t mean you’re giving up. It means you’re giving yourself the space to grow, to reflect, and to plan your next move with intention. Just like the earth moves through seasons of growth and rest, so do we. And there’s nothing “unproductive” about that.
ask yourself
In what ways are you not honoring rest? Does it show up as negative self-talk, where you constantly feel like you’re not doing enough? Or maybe it’s in the form of overwork—pushing yourself harder instead of taking a break when you know you need one. Do you find yourself micromanaging or nitpicking, because that feels more acceptable than simply letting things be?
This is your reminder that you can rest. You should rest. And when you do, you’ll see that rest isn’t a retreat—it’s a powerful part of moving forward.
If you’re looking for a little guidance on how to find balance between your ambitions and your need for rest, come check out The YL Harmony Planner. It’s designed to help you plan in harmony with the natural rhythms of life, so you can honor both your work and your rest. And don’t forget to join us for our sneak peek event on October 19th, where we’ll dive deeper into how to make rest a part of your productivity plan.
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I help women create thriving lives by identifying their core desires, restoring work/life balance and focusing on overall wellbeing.
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Hi I'm Yvonne
I work with women just like you who feel a deeper calling to explore the meaning in their lives.